Christmas time family vent thread.

[texasmr2]

I'll start...

My brother makes his twice a year pilgrimage to visit our mom, who is fighting stage four breast cancer, today yet he only lives 50 miles away. I am always amazed how his head and ego (and $70K truck) can fit in the driveway much less through the door. It amazes me how people who have no clue or have never changed an adult diaper or 'cleaned' a soiled body (actually took care of the people they SAY they love the most) think they know it all or know what your world/life is like. He knocks on my bedroom door so I answer and immediately see the self righteous look on his face and the hollier than thou tone in his voice....

Him..."You got a moment?"
Me..."No".
Him..."FU".
Me..."You got a full belly, how is your soul? Do you think God will forgive you for using work as an excuse over your mother?!?!"

My last Christmas story.

 

[deezdad]

 

[SPOOLFOOL2]

I will be praying for your family on this Christmas day.
God can change anyone. I know this. He changed me...

Mike Barnard

 

[ITSAV6]

You are not alone, I just chose to not associate with certain family members starting over 20 years ago. After Dad died I have done the same to the rest. God only changes people who let him.

 

[fast86gn]

Festivus for the rest of us.

 

[texasmr2]

I would die for my brother and maybe I should have asked him what the topic of discussion would be yet his tone was quite adversarial from my perspective. I have been very ill since my Colorado trip, damn airport germs I guess, and have been bed ridden for an entire week. There is a huge family dynamic going on which is all based around our mothers health issues which weighs very heavily on him as well.

The basis of my issue with him in general is that since he was kicked out of the house and sent to live with our father at 17 is that when he makes his annual pilgrimage he thinks he walks on water and his opinion has been blessed with holy water. He does not deal with the daily grind and daily care and support of a aging parent. Hell he only lives 30 minutes from our father yet only see's him 2-3 times a year while I spend days with our father each month and talk on the phone with him every week.

With all that being vented, the burden weighs heavily on me, I guess I will text him and ask if he still wants to talk.

LIFE....WHAT A TRIP!

 

[Frederickdav]

When my wife was dying from lung cancer her daughter, from her first marriage, would come to the hospital or nursing home and complain about everything. Then she would go to the lounge and talk on her cell phone for an hour or so then leave. She and the Hospis nurse got together and made me promice to my wife that I would maintain a relationship with the daughter after my wife passed. Then when my wife passed, she got mad because she didn't get any money. Even when I cashed in my wife's IRA and gave it to her and her brother she still stayed mad at me. So I cut her and her brother out of my will and am leaving everything to my son that from the same marriage. It's been about ten years since I've seen or heard from my step-kids. See what the love of money can do? As for the ops situation, please try to make up with your brother. The last thing your mother needs is her children fighting while she's on her death bed.

 

[texasmr2]

When my wife was dying from lung cancer her daughter, from her first marriage, would come to the hospital or nursing home and complain about everything. Then she would go to the lounge and talk on her cell phone for an hour or so then leave. She and the Hospis nurse got together and made me promice to my wife that I would maintain a relationship with the daughter after my wife passed. Then when my wife passed, she got mad because she didn't get any money. Even when I cashed in my wife's IRA and gave it to her and her brother she still stayed mad at me. So I cut her and her brother out of my will and am leaving everything to my son that from the same marriage. It's been about ten years since I've seen or heard from my step-kids. See what the love of money can do? As for the ops situation, please try to make up with your brother. The last thing your mother needs is her children fighting while she's on her death bed.

I am sorry for your loss....the cut that will never stop bleeding .

My brother and I are not actually fighting it was just his timing. While I wear my heart on my sleeve he keeps his locked away in his YETI cooler out of fear it will be discovered that he is actually human and not an alien. Our mother married our stepfather when we were both toddlers and gave us a great home and life but after his stroke and amputation from diabetes it was I who adjusted my work schedule around his care and cleaned and fed him while my brother puts work first and everything else, accept his wife, second. We talk maybe four times a year, two times when he magically appears and the other two times is when he actually answers my phone call to check on him, he never calls me just to say hi. Money is not our issue. My brother is being promoted to VP of his company after the first of the year after 33yrs on the job that my stepfather and mother helped him get. He already made foreman and makes $200K+ a year and will soon be pushing $400K/yr.

I think he holds a lot of guilt yet does not know how to express his true feelings because they will make him feel weak. I did text him yesterday and asked if he felt like talking about what he wanted to discuss, no reply.