Some of Seinfield's favorite lines...

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THE CROW

Member
Joined
May 25, 2001
Messages
213
>Some of Seinfield's favorite lines...
>
> Never raise your hands to your kids. It leaves your
> groin unprotected.
> ~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~
> I'm not into working out. My philosophy: No pain, no
> pain.
> ~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~
> I'm still trying to figure out why kamikaze pilots
> wore helmets.
> ~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~
> Ever wonder if illiterate people get the full effect
> of alphabet soup?
> ~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~
> I always wanted to be somebody, but I should have been
> more specific.
> ~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~
> Did you ever notice when you blow in a dog's face he
> gets mad at you?
> But when you take him in a car he sticks his head out
> the window.
> ~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~
> Have you ever noticed, anybody going slower than you
> is an idiot and
> anyone going faster than you is a maniac.
> ~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~
> You have to stay in shape. My grandmother started
> walking five miles a
> day when she was 60. She's 97 today and we don't know
> where she is.
> ~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~
> The reason most people play golf is to wear clothes
> they would not be
> caught dead in otherwise.
> ~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~
> Anytime four New Yorkers get into a cab together
> without arguing, a
> bank robbery has just taken place.
> ~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~
> I have six locks on my door, all in a row. When I go
> out, I lock every
> other one. I figure no matter how long somebody stands
> there picking
> the locks, they are always locking three.
> ~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~
> I had a linguistics professor who said that it's man's
> ability to use
> language that makes him the dominant species on the
> planet. That may be,
> but I think there's one other thing that separates us
> from animals. We
> aren't afraid of vacuum cleaners.
> ~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~
> The statistics on sanity are that one out of every
> four persons is
> suffering from some form of mental illness. Think of
> your three best
> friends. If they are okay, then it's you.
> ~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~
> TV ads show you how detergents take out bloodstains. I
> think if you've
> got a bloodstained T-shirt, maybe laundry isn't your
> biggest problem.
> ~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~
> I ask people why they have deer heads on their walls.
> They always say
> "because it's such a beautiful animal." There you go.
> I think my mother
> is attractive, but I only have photographs of her.
 
Even reading some of these still makes me laugh out loud.Thanks for the reminder.One of the greatest shows EVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Geoff
 
Not sure where you got that list, but I am pretty sure at least some of those are from Jeff Foxworthy.
 
Why do they call it ovaltine? The jar is round, the glass is round, they should call it roundtine.
 
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