It's been almost a week since my best friend for the last 19 years comitted suicide. I've been very upset and its difficult to write this, but thought I'd share with my TB buds in hopes that it might help someone spot the signs and intervene if they ever notice this in any of their friends.
It was a combination of things, not being able to see his kids (x-wife kept coming up with accusations to prevent him from even having visitation rights for the last 2 years), he owned his own business and did not keep up with the paper work and the tax man was freezing his accounts and he began stressing over that and began drinking more and more.
He continued to make comittments to his customers that he could not deliver to and in so doing that, could never face them again even if someone had helped him out of the situation he was in.
Appearently this started building over a year ago.
I noticed he was drinking more and more hard liquor, used to be we just went out and had a few beers. But for the last few months he could put away a bottle of Yeager in a night.
I also noticed he was saying he had to work all of the time and he couldn't go out much..he was a photographer so he had weddings all of the time.
Yet, on days he had told me he had a wedding, he would call to see what was going on and I never said anything or asked what was wrong with the wedding he said he had to shoot a few days earlier.
He seemed more distant the last few months as well.
Was very image conscious.
Appearently was claiming to be very busy to hide the fact he was drinking so much.
His x-girlfriend said he would take trips out of town by himself alot to "get away", something I did not know.
He had a past history with this as his Mom did the same thing when he was only 6..I did not know this either.
2 weeks before, he stopped returning my calls, even on his birthday when we usually would meet for a drink or something to celebrate his birthday.
His other best friend had called everyday for the last 3 weeks with no return call.
His business line was disconnected as well a week or 2 prior, this should have told me there was a serious problem.
All in all, the bottle killed him
If one of your friend's doesn't return several of your calls and that is not characteristic of them and you feel something has not been right with them, immediately go to them in person and/or contact some of their other friends to see if they are having the same problem.
He left behind a 10 year old son and 6 year old twin sons.
There's so many other details I can't think of at the moment..
Hopefully this will insight someone if they ever run into this situation.
It was a combination of things, not being able to see his kids (x-wife kept coming up with accusations to prevent him from even having visitation rights for the last 2 years), he owned his own business and did not keep up with the paper work and the tax man was freezing his accounts and he began stressing over that and began drinking more and more.
He continued to make comittments to his customers that he could not deliver to and in so doing that, could never face them again even if someone had helped him out of the situation he was in.
Appearently this started building over a year ago.
I noticed he was drinking more and more hard liquor, used to be we just went out and had a few beers. But for the last few months he could put away a bottle of Yeager in a night.
I also noticed he was saying he had to work all of the time and he couldn't go out much..he was a photographer so he had weddings all of the time.
Yet, on days he had told me he had a wedding, he would call to see what was going on and I never said anything or asked what was wrong with the wedding he said he had to shoot a few days earlier.
He seemed more distant the last few months as well.
Was very image conscious.
Appearently was claiming to be very busy to hide the fact he was drinking so much.
His x-girlfriend said he would take trips out of town by himself alot to "get away", something I did not know.
He had a past history with this as his Mom did the same thing when he was only 6..I did not know this either.
2 weeks before, he stopped returning my calls, even on his birthday when we usually would meet for a drink or something to celebrate his birthday.
His other best friend had called everyday for the last 3 weeks with no return call.
His business line was disconnected as well a week or 2 prior, this should have told me there was a serious problem.
All in all, the bottle killed him
If one of your friend's doesn't return several of your calls and that is not characteristic of them and you feel something has not been right with them, immediately go to them in person and/or contact some of their other friends to see if they are having the same problem.
He left behind a 10 year old son and 6 year old twin sons.
There's so many other details I can't think of at the moment..
Hopefully this will insight someone if they ever run into this situation.