pvt num 11
Finally driving it
- Joined
- Feb 23, 2005
- Messages
- 295
I had this thought as a sense of humour, sort of "if you can't laugh at yourself then you shouldn't be driving it" sort of thing.
-You consider changing a head gasket as a rite of passage for ownership.
-You've ever considered sealing your t-tops shut to keep the water out. That or actually changed the seals…
-You have learned to loathe one-piece rear main seals.
-You wish you didn't have a frame member in the way so you could easily drop the oil pan to change aforementioned rear main seal.
-You had to lift up the engine and jerry-rig a way to keep it up there in order to change said rear main seal.
-You broke something trying to lift the engine in order to drop the pan in order to change the rear main seal.
-It leaked after you were done with it anyway.
-Learning all of that, you simply learned to drop newspaper under the car when you parked it.
-You know what a headlight control module is.
-You've had to replace one - if you could find one that worked.
-20psi is a mild level of boost.
-Mandatory owner's equipment includes a Scan Master at a minimum.
-Knock Retard and O2 Millivolts - The Holy Sacraments of the Scan Master.
-Ricers are amused to see a mere Fireturd showing up at a race event… with a laptop.
-Import Enthusiasts are impressed to see the same and will actually talk with you about the car.
-You've gotten worked up about someone asking if it was a 305 or a 350… again.
-Carbed 350's make you laugh.
-Carbed 383's make you laugh.
-Twin-turbo LS1's make you green with envy.
-You think twenty miles per gallon for a V6 is great mileage.
-You've had to replace a MAF sensor.
-You replaced that stock MAF for something more modern and piggy-backed it into the ECM.
-You ditched the stock ECM entirely and went speed-density just so you wouldn't have to deal with a MAF ever again.
-You dread the day your nine-bolt rear will eventually break.
-You have seriously contemplated a Ford 9-inch rear axle, just in case.
-You've priced TH200R4 performance rebuilds, for when the stock one breaks.
-You have contemplated shoving in a TH400 for when the TH200R4 breaks.
-Locking the converter is a good way to gain a few tenths in the 1/4, even if it is downright abusive.
-You regularly check Ebay for an owners kit, even though you have three complete sets already.
-Chrome CAN get you home, if it involves the MAF-to-Turbo section.
-Your turbo heatshield says "Turbo Trans Am" on it.
-You fall into to one of two camps: Door Stickers or No Door Stickers.
-You paid more then a hundred bucks for an original OEM sparkplug wire set - that will sit in the box until you decide to sell them.
-You don't mind falling into the driver's seat - even if you're over forty-five years old.
-You sneer at a TTA that's been repainted some color other then white.
-Making the car run tens in the 1/4-mile while looking bone stock is your ultimate goal for the car.
-You sneer at all the mundane non-turbocharged Firebirds and Trans Am's. Except 1LE-optioned ones and Firehawks.
-The thought of whooping up on a C5 Z06 excites you.
-You're sick and tired of blowing head gaskets.
-You would convert over to a roller hydraulic cam, but the price is downright scary, so you put up with the stock flat hydraulic bumpstick.
-Race-prepping the car involves turning the A/C off.
-Your new or rebuilt engine break-in time was the fifty miles to the track, then running 11's on a "conservative" tune.
-Alky injection is the only way to get into the elevens or faster reliably.
-You dread the thought of having to hack up the front clip to install a front-mount intercooler, even though it will work far better then the stock one.
-Your replacement catalytic converter was a Y-pipe with a removable cap on one end.
-You know what THDP stands for.
-…And you're willing to sacrifice your first-born to get one.
-You're regularly pushing just how far the stock long block will go - and wonder why you windowed the block at 28psi.
-Stock pistons and crank are good into the tens, if tuned right.
-Stock camshaft is good until the eleven's, and quite possibly the tens.
3600-lbs is not a bad weight for the car - perish the thought of hacking weight off it!
-Only high-mileage or salvaged TTA's are fit for regular track duty.
-You whine about TTA's not fetching the price they deserve on Ebay.
-You fit in better at a Turbo Regal meet then at a Firebird meet.
Any other things I missed? Feel free to add!
-You consider changing a head gasket as a rite of passage for ownership.
-You've ever considered sealing your t-tops shut to keep the water out. That or actually changed the seals…
-You have learned to loathe one-piece rear main seals.
-You wish you didn't have a frame member in the way so you could easily drop the oil pan to change aforementioned rear main seal.
-You had to lift up the engine and jerry-rig a way to keep it up there in order to change said rear main seal.
-You broke something trying to lift the engine in order to drop the pan in order to change the rear main seal.
-It leaked after you were done with it anyway.
-Learning all of that, you simply learned to drop newspaper under the car when you parked it.
-You know what a headlight control module is.
-You've had to replace one - if you could find one that worked.
-20psi is a mild level of boost.
-Mandatory owner's equipment includes a Scan Master at a minimum.
-Knock Retard and O2 Millivolts - The Holy Sacraments of the Scan Master.
-Ricers are amused to see a mere Fireturd showing up at a race event… with a laptop.
-Import Enthusiasts are impressed to see the same and will actually talk with you about the car.
-You've gotten worked up about someone asking if it was a 305 or a 350… again.
-Carbed 350's make you laugh.
-Carbed 383's make you laugh.
-Twin-turbo LS1's make you green with envy.
-You think twenty miles per gallon for a V6 is great mileage.
-You've had to replace a MAF sensor.
-You replaced that stock MAF for something more modern and piggy-backed it into the ECM.
-You ditched the stock ECM entirely and went speed-density just so you wouldn't have to deal with a MAF ever again.
-You dread the day your nine-bolt rear will eventually break.
-You have seriously contemplated a Ford 9-inch rear axle, just in case.
-You've priced TH200R4 performance rebuilds, for when the stock one breaks.
-You have contemplated shoving in a TH400 for when the TH200R4 breaks.
-Locking the converter is a good way to gain a few tenths in the 1/4, even if it is downright abusive.
-You regularly check Ebay for an owners kit, even though you have three complete sets already.
-Chrome CAN get you home, if it involves the MAF-to-Turbo section.
-Your turbo heatshield says "Turbo Trans Am" on it.
-You fall into to one of two camps: Door Stickers or No Door Stickers.
-You paid more then a hundred bucks for an original OEM sparkplug wire set - that will sit in the box until you decide to sell them.
-You don't mind falling into the driver's seat - even if you're over forty-five years old.
-You sneer at a TTA that's been repainted some color other then white.
-Making the car run tens in the 1/4-mile while looking bone stock is your ultimate goal for the car.
-You sneer at all the mundane non-turbocharged Firebirds and Trans Am's. Except 1LE-optioned ones and Firehawks.
-The thought of whooping up on a C5 Z06 excites you.
-You're sick and tired of blowing head gaskets.
-You would convert over to a roller hydraulic cam, but the price is downright scary, so you put up with the stock flat hydraulic bumpstick.
-Race-prepping the car involves turning the A/C off.
-Your new or rebuilt engine break-in time was the fifty miles to the track, then running 11's on a "conservative" tune.
-Alky injection is the only way to get into the elevens or faster reliably.
-You dread the thought of having to hack up the front clip to install a front-mount intercooler, even though it will work far better then the stock one.
-Your replacement catalytic converter was a Y-pipe with a removable cap on one end.
-You know what THDP stands for.
-…And you're willing to sacrifice your first-born to get one.
-You're regularly pushing just how far the stock long block will go - and wonder why you windowed the block at 28psi.
-Stock pistons and crank are good into the tens, if tuned right.
-Stock camshaft is good until the eleven's, and quite possibly the tens.
3600-lbs is not a bad weight for the car - perish the thought of hacking weight off it!
-Only high-mileage or salvaged TTA's are fit for regular track duty.
-You whine about TTA's not fetching the price they deserve on Ebay.
-You fit in better at a Turbo Regal meet then at a Firebird meet.
Any other things I missed? Feel free to add!
I just sold that car, and had no idea what I was missing out on 
